Monthly Archives: August 2017

Styxenhammer: President Trump Will Crush All GOP Naysayers, Cruise to Second Term Triumph

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A.De rock winged eyeliner on “The Show”

Top Ten 6-week sales figures for K-pop Girl Group Releases in 2017

–as compiled by a poster at onehallyu: Downloads 1. Twice – Knock Knock (735,770) 2. Red Velvet – Red Flavor (721,421) 3. Twice – Signal (641,816) 4. Blackpink – AIIYL (626,381) 5. Mamamoo – Yes I am (624,834) 6. Unnies – Right? (567,938) 7. Red Velvet – Rookie (557,487) 8. Apink – Five (487,546) 9. […]

Romantic April (“April Story” on Music Bank)

Here is the February 3rd broadcast of e.one and April’s lush masterpiece of melancholy K-pop:   With our agonized snow princesses (including today’s birthday ballerina Rachel)  enacting such a poignant and impassioned “painful fairy tale”.

Happy Birthday Rachel!

April’s Rachel– who, omg, is the new maknae!  how did I not notice before? OH THAT’S RIGHT BECAUSE I CAN’T DO MAFF DUMBASS 2001 COMES AFTER 2000!!!– turns seventeen! Whew! I was freaking out there for a moment.  Now when Jinsol’s birthday comes on December 4th she’ll turn sixteen! Anyway, Rachel only joined us this […]

Romantic WJSN (“Secret” on Music Bank)

The audio isn’t ideal on this one, but with the slightly gothic costumes that make WJSN look like witchy teens this one is a pleasure for the eyes. I especially love watching the ways it catches, for instance, Dayoung in those broken mechanical doll reaching-above-our-heads-for-the-heavens motions.  Plus, Goddess Bona in that black beret!  Exy of […]

Romantic T-ara (“Tiamo” on Music Bank)

I’ve been sifting through some of the myriad highlights of my years watching K-pop broadcast performances so as to add just a few chestnuts to the “pages” at the top of the blog, but springboarding from one to another I caught up with this Music Bank performance of “Tiamo”, this time without their backup (forward-up?) […]

“All girl groups are amazing except Ugly twice. Cannot sing live. Cheap. Nursery rhyme songs no creativity at all”

–writes first time poster Zinka at onehallyu. Well, especially for a first ever post (comment #150 in the relevant thread), Zinka really hits it out of the ballpark. I cannot for the life of me understand how anybody admires any of Twice’s singles.  They’re complete garbage.  Quite literally, every girl group in K-pop makes better […]

Baby Soul Got Kicked Out of Canada?!? (where’s Eric?)

We’ll stop at 35:56 on our 2nd day of trying to sit through episode one of Lovelyz Loves Canada, as “East Team”, who appear to be rather lost in a frighteningly dark and empty and alienating Montreal, get accosted by a couple of fat white chicks who apparently know nothing about K-pop but want to […]

Awakening from a nightmare set in Canada, I set about watching “Lovelyz Loves Canada”

A mountaineer plunges off the side of a grisly peak in the Yukon–but survives his fall (and even being whacked midfall by another falling body), only to be declared the victim of foul play by a Native American female paramedic after he lands safely in a parking lot but is put down by an unseen […]

Though it’s not as elaborate as the Comeback Stages for Inkigayo or Show! Music Core, Lovelyz’ “Now, We” on M! Countdown Has Its Distinctive Charms

I haven’t done justice to this stage, with its floating furniture straight out of the video, which gives it a quaint minimalist charm (here the chairs are colorful, as though they’d taken a brief detour through Oh My Girl’s “Coloring Book” MV), and with the Lovelyz in sweet pyjama-style outfits, our Main Vocals Kei and […]

Youngji Loves Leather

If all Youngji ever got out of joining Kara was recording Day & Night, one of the best pop records of all time, and its fine follow-up In Love, that would be riches enough to ensure her place in pop music history. But occasionally she got to perform some of the old Kara stuff too.  […]

The Comeback When Yulhee Inherited the “Frozen” Hair from Soyeon: Laboum’s “Only U” on Simply K-pop

This is “Eclipse”

Brief Games with April

Bossy Yena, defeatist Jinsol, moist Chaewon, and all the gang take a few minutes out to play games in front of Pops in Seoul’s cameras at Pick & Talk!   Even if “Mayday” is sort of the lesser “Happy” it’s still a fun little tune and April look ready to give us more musical action […]

Happy Birthday Bona!

WJSN Goddess Bona turns twenty-two! May all your moments be Happy Moments through your long and magnificent life!  God bless Bona, and happy birthday!

August 19th Dawns in Korea, the Supreme Birthdaygasm of Idol Birthdays! Happy Birthday Umji, Yerin, Solbin, and Bona!

Happy birthday WJSN Goddess Bona!   Happy birthday Laboum Solbin!   Happy birthday GFriend Yerin and Umji!

Happy Birthday Eunji!

The Queen of K-pop turns 24! Having won, as a soloist and part of A Pink, a collective eight show trophies thus far in 2017, Eunji is having a splendid year.  And we may yet see another A Pink minialbum this year.  The possibilities for this young star are endless.   We pray the glorious […]

The Black Rapture (an afternoon improvisation)

It was a bright and frosty dawn That day that woke so strangely still, When quick there broke discovery Of a mystery to thrill. The peoples rose up from their beds, Both White and Brown and Gook, To find that from the earth had fled Every last man or woman spook. There were no Blacks! […]

Still the most Classically perfect and appealing pop song ever recorded

  And what a beautiful performance too!  This chestnut will always delight and amaze!

Barry Obama’s ridiculous tweet

Fact: black babies are born into this world smelling like ass to the noses of every other race. Bonus fact: Islam blows.  If you’re not born hating it, you’ll figure it out eventually. What the hell does “background” even mean?  Giving blowjobs in Indonesia when you can’t remember your father’s face? Fuck off Obama.  And […]

GFriend’s Heart Whispers: “Love Whisper” on Show! Music Core

Happy Birthday Bomi!

The goddess of media (comedy, fashion, song) turns twenty-four!   To be sure, it seems like a long time we’ve been together. But you are still adorable and young, great Bomi! May God keep you safe, and your nation safe from harm.  A happy Birthday to you, a merry day for all of A Pink, […]

I, for one, welcome our Alt-Right Overlords

 

“This is Chinese greatest strength. DO NOT worry about refugee, black nigroes transexual, harry potter”

says Weihan Wang.

Hayoung’s Smile of Infinity

Hayoung’s smile blooming at 2:54, seen closely at 2:55, coukd be the best smile ever recorded. Now there is a smile that bears with it the Mandate of Heaven.  God bless you forever, dear girl!

지금부터 (A Pink closes the video!)

Jessica Jung Through the Seasons of Love: Jessica’s “Summer Storm” MV Review

As we expect with Jessica, this latest release is another luminously photographed vision of Jessica playing around at hanging out at home, showing her sensitive yet whimsically domestic side. Is that clock at 9:05 a SNSD reference?  Sunny and– was it Sooyoung?– recently had an exchange about a “five member” versus a “nine member” group.  […]

Victoria’s Secret

Oh My Gi7l with “Coloring Book”

Goddess Jiho and the gang left some spirited performances in the KBS grabbag, as with this blaze of energy– though I pray the next comeback will be OM8!

GFriend’s Instaclassic “Love Whisper” Stage on Music Bank

An oasis of refulgence as GFriend unleash their dazzling new single upon this achingly romantic stage: But why was SinB stuck with a boring out of date fleshtone mic when everyone else got the glamorous new ones I first recall becoming a “thing” when Seohyun did “Don’t Say No”? Whatever the explanation, we won’t let […]

Listening to SNSD’s “Promise” and thinking about the Albigensian Crusade and Hitler

Well, I’m just being honest. I was thinking that, if the Albigensian Crusade was a genocide, it may well have been a fully justified one, as the Albigensians may have been a total threat to human survival, a mass psychosis. Whereas Churchill’s firebombing genocide against the German family was just pure evil.  Probably less than […]

“Chinese work hard technology”

I don’t know if this is a parody account or for real, but it rocks: africa black nigro govenments can not succeed without Chinese organize expertise U.S. cannot compete Chinese work hard technology. Chinese Children learn arithmetic and health exercise at camp. This boys wear a dress Fuck a #GoogleMemo Chinese technology company give work […]

1,2,3,4,”Five”: A Pink on Show Champion Ep 235

August belongs to the swelling chorus of GFriend’s “Love Whisper”, but the lifetime with Pink Up has only begun, so let us “stroll down memory lane” with July’s defining hit, A Pink’s smashing comeback “Five”:  

Styxenhammer: Trump has people chasing their own tails, and it’s amusing

The always articulate Styxenhammer puts on a shirt and explains why Pres. Trump can’t get the GOP Congress to do crap, why he’s right to tell them to go screw themselves, and how he’ll likely achieve that.

Dance Time: Laboum’s “Only U” on Music Bank

Laboum and their charming phalanx of backup girls bring their insistently jazzy summer single to Music Bank’s stage. I’m beginning to think this single may represent the long-awaited transcendence of the “quirky single” phenomenon that has dogged K-pop this year from “Rookie” through “Coloring Book” and “Red Flavor” and so on.  Though I was amiably […]

I missed Yeonjung’s glorious 18th birthday on the 3rd

In fairness, I had to get my car towed.  Blessings to you always, Teen Goddess Yeonjung!    

This is about something deep and important and possibly Satanic, but I’ll explain all about that later

  For now, for reference’s sake I’ll drop these here.     I’m not saying there’s anything wrong or diabolical in the content here– go ahead and do your planks (I need to get back on them myself); rather, this is evidence that supports the thesis of a thinker I recently discovered who has a […]

A Pink Naeun Triptych: Abel Gance Wept!

The official MBC Stage Mix version of A Pink’s three triumphant broadcast performances for “Five” on Show! Music Core (Comeback Stage + two trophy wins!):  

It’s Time for Justice: Thoughts from the amusing Alt-Centrist Styxhexenhammer on Gov. Justice, Pres. Trump, and the new Cold War