Tim Kaine? Are you f**king kidding me?

I cannot fathom why Tim Kaine–the Gerald Ford to Mark Warner’s Ronald Reagan– has long been talked of as a possible Democratic Vice-Presidential nominee, much less why Hillary has now decided to pick him.

His predecessor Mark Warner performed something of a political coup just by getting elected governor in Virginia.  Probably northern VA demographics helped him to that, in a state doomed to “turn purple”, but Warner did campaign hard in rural areas, and as governor, besides his other centrist successes, managed to build a considerable rapport with traditionally conservative voters.

Speaking as a pro-Trump Reactionary extremist, Warner’s policies are doubtless too beyond my sympathies for me to judge impartially, but let’s say that, from a mainstream perspective, Warner was a very successful leader and trailblazer, something of a star even, despite his lack of any particular “wow” factor in terms of personal charisma.

Kaine had it easy. He rode into office on Warner’s popular coattails.  His governorship was undistinguished and considerably less popular.  Plus, if Warner isn’t a great speaker or a “sexy” figure, he at least looks respectable and has a certain gravitas (if only the technocratic version of such).  Kaine, on the other hand, looks and sounds very rabbity,and gives off a gay vibe.  It’s hard even to pretend to take him seriously.

Perhaps Mark Warner is something like the Democrats’ version of Mitt Romney– smart, rich, successful, well-meaning, but at once out of step with his party and too unimaginative to reckon with the real challenges of the age.  Fair enough.  But he simply is far more impressive than the dull, faintly ludicrous Tim Kaine.

So why is Warner still languishing in the Senate (where he clearly is not very happy) and Kaine is running (unsuccessfully!) for Vice-President?

Oh well.  Mark Warner would make a fine Democratic nominee for President, to lose respectably to President Trump in 2020.

Better yet, maybe Warner would accept a post in the Trump cabinet?  If he’s willing to adopt his worldview to the truth about immigration, race, Islam, and IQ, Mark Warner would make a fine asset to the talent bench for redirecting America into a more just and prosperous 21st Century.  Silly Tim Kaine, on the other hand, hasn’t got a chance.  It pains me to look at him, frankly.

Also, whether or not you think Mike Pence is macho, he’s going to look very butch standing next to fidgety Tim Kaine.

 

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