Terrifyingly Sexy: Red Velvet’s “Automatic” MV

Well, this is just flabbergasting really– it’s like a David Lynch wet dream:

–I mean it’s brilliant.  Just jawdropping.

Sigh.  But my heart is so heavy, it’s hard to enjoy it.

I mean, here I am with the Rainbow comeback, the Lovelyz comeback, the Fiestar comeback, the eminent comebacks from Crayon Pop and Dal Shabet and miss A.  My mind is already K-pop overloaded.

And then I learn Red Velvet is adding a fifth member.  Whoa.  Last year, Red Velvet was the only thing SM Ent did right– so now it looks like they’ll ruin that too.

So already my mind was shuffling Red Velvet to the back burner.  And now we have the Rainbow debacle, with their glorious “Black Swan” suddenly the biggest flop in K-pop girl group history, and maybe Rainbow will never even make another record.  I’m devastated.  Yes, in K-pop there are always winners and losers, but the “losers” seldom come out in such a horribly losing-y position.  I mean, everybody remembers how 4minute’s “Volume Up” lost to SISTAR’s “Alone”, but “Volume Up” still won show trophies and stuff.  Dal Shabet never win trophies, but they get in the Top Ten and stuff.  But poor Rainbow has sunk like a stone.

And meanwhile Red Velvet– can you believe it?  THIS ISN’T EVEN THEIR COMEBACK.  “Automatic” is just some freebie they’ve tossed out as an appetizer for their actual comeback, “Ice Cream Cake”.

So SM Ent underwrites the creation of  this incredible video, just as an appetizer.

Oh Lord.  Some people get the breaks. . . .

–I haven’t even said much about the “Automatic” video itself.  What can I say?  I’ve just watched it twice and I’ll probably watch it three hundred times more before the year is out.  It’s absolutely extraordinary.  It’s just about the sexiest and most mysterious thing ever.  It makes my stomach weak– at least, I think it does; but to be honest, my stomach already was weak with sunken feelings for poor dear Rainbow.

And heaven help us, if Red Velvet’s “Be Natural” cover showed them being a bit too sake-shee for their “Happiness” image, what can we say about this?  I do wish K-pop would stop yo-yoing girls around from cute to sexy and back.  It messes with my feelings unpleasantly.  Having seen Red Velvet as smoldering orange-blondes moving through this Dario Argento dreamscape of secrets and thrills, can we ever take them back as playful teens who rely on the wisdom of their mothers?

God knows SM Ent doesn’t have a reputation for caring about their artists as human beings– but they’re really rolling out the red carpet to make Red Velvet a success.

I wish somebody would do the same for Rainbow.

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