Still Crazy Like a Mia

Mia Farrow is at it again.  The most current comment at the moment (from “poopmenot”) at the Vanity Fair piece reads:

So Mia casually marries a know playboy.Then divorce him and marries someone else’s husband. She then fills up the house with disable kids from all corners of the world. She’s not even sure who the biological father is of one of her biological kids.

How can anyone possibly have a normal family bonding with 11 adapted kids on top of the 4 biological, with their added physical challenges and race incongruity. Can the average person really be asked to accept as normal a family structure that mirrors an international special needs school? Not just once but every single day and every single moment. The stares and whispers at every family outing. And just the sheer number of kids: if you spend 30 minutes with each kid that’s like holding an 8-hour a day job with only a 30 minutes lunch break.

And who’s going to preach to us this new and improved politically correct family structure? Mia the two times divorced, home wrecker? Maybe this ‘progressive’ lifestyle wasn’t for Woody and I don’t blame him. 

Hearsay aside, Woody’s only ‘crime’ is marrying one of Mia’s adopted daughters and so far that marriage had lasted better than any of Mia’s marriages.

–I don’t know if they’ve got the numbers right on how many adoptees it is  (can anybody count that high?); anyway, I don’t intend to read the whole thing.  I read the “first page” which is all Mia bitching– including this supposed revelation she’d been banging Sinatra all the rest of his life; then the absurd cuckold Andre Previn still siding with Mia, who wrecked his home and then left him, by snarling that his adopted daughter Soon-yi “doesn’t exist”; there’s the Farrow boy who proudly photoshopped Woody out of all “family” pictures; and then there’s “Dylan” or whatever it’s called, with her hypnotic-sounding fantasies of daddy abusing her in the attic.

Needless to say, I just don’t take those accusations seriously.  I have always–always— thought Mia Farrow was a nutjob, and that was just from watching her in Rosemary’s Baby (terrific performance, but almost too real) and Hannah and her Sisters ( even when I was sixteen, that shot of her looking straight into the camera and wailing, “But I want a baby WITH YOU!” looked to me like Woody Allen’s cry for help– “See!  See, people, she’s crazy!”).  And their split didn’t come until I was in college.  Obviously Diane Keaton would’ve been a better life partner than Mia (and she says she’s never stopped loving Woody!); but hey, he got a hot Asian instead, so best deal ever.

And now what’s this about a new acclaimed Woody Allen film?  You know, Steve Sailer’s reductive opinion-making (‘the Coen Brothers are two people, so their movies must be twice as good as a Woody Allen picture!’) notwithstanding, Woody has made many fine, and a few great, films over the last decade.  Anything Else, Match Point, Midnight in Paris— and I have a deep-seated affection for Scoop, and then You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger was a fine elegant little fable.  And I’m still missing some.

So I can easily chalk all this Farrowism up to jealousy.  That woman is like a damn cult over there, constantly reapplying the brainwashing, making those kids (who are hardly “hers” in any event!) pay endless obsequies to her sense of grievance.  What a hell for those poor things.

I’d be surprised if all her sons aren’t gay by now.


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